jh bloguje

Written and directed by Kevin Smith

IMDb link

…

She was pretty young, hunhh?

Twenty-two; same as us.

How'd he die?

Broke his neck.

That's embarrassing?

He broke his neck trying to suck his own dick.

Shut the hell up.

Bible truth.

Stop it.

I swear.

Oh, my god.

Come on. Haven't you ever tried to suck your own dick?

No!

Yeah sure. You're so repressed.

Because I never tried to suck my own dick?

No, because you won't admit to it. As if a guy's a fucking pervert because he tries to go down on himself. You're as curious as the rest of us, pal. You've tried it.

Who found him?

My cousin? My aunt found him. On his bed, doubled over himself with his legs on top. Dick in his mouth. My aunt freaked out. It was a mess.

His dick was in his mouth?

Balls resting on his lips.

He made it, hunhh?

Yeah, but at what a price.

I could never reach.

Reach what?

You know.

What, your dick?

Yeah. Like you said, you know. I guess everyone tries it, sooner of later.

I never tried it.
Fucking pervert.

…

CAITLIN: Promise me it'll always be like that.

DANTE: Like what?

CAITLIN: When you just lie perfectly still and let me do everything.

DANTE: Um…okay.

RANDAL: Am I missing something here?

CAITLIN: I went back there, and Dante was already waiting for me.

RANDAL: He was?

CAITLIN: It was so cool. He didn't say a word. He was just…ready, you know? And we didn't kiss or talk or anything. He just sat there and let me do all the work.

RANDAL: (to DANTE) You dog! I didn't see you go back there.

CAITLIN: And the fact that there weren't any lights made it so… God! That was so great!

DANTE: It wasn't me.

CAITLIN: Yeah, right. Who was it: Randal?

DANTE: (to RANDAL) Was it you?

RANDAL: I was here the whole time.

CAITLIN: You two better quit it.

DANTE: I'm serious.

CAITLIN: We didn't just have sex in the bathroom?

DANTE: No.

…

SILENT BOB: You know, there's a million fine-looking women in the world, but they don't all bring you lasagne at work. Most of them just cheat on you.

…